


One kiss in three takes

by coffeelings



Category: Actor RPF, Kill Your Darlings (2013), Kill Your Darlings (2013) RPF
Genre: Dane-focused third person, M/M, Sexual Tension, inordinate amounts of kissing, unrealistic RPF from Kill Your Darlings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-28
Updated: 2015-04-28
Packaged: 2018-03-26 03:59:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3836209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeelings/pseuds/coffeelings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first kiss was timid. The second kiss was unexpected. The third kiss was clarifying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One kiss in three takes

**Author's Note:**

> Aaaaallright so this is RPF, and as such, is 100% fantasy imposed on the images of a few talented humans that exist wherever they are in the world and are NOT at all in any way a part of what is written here. I own nothing except my own words.

The first take was timid.

 

  

The scene unfolded a little too slowly. The dialogue, the time Lucien spent with his head on Allen’s shoulder... it seemed like he was staring into space over Allen's body for too long. When Allen _finally_  touched his chin, spoke, and leaned in, Lucien tilted his head back, closed his eyes, and–

Smoke. The first flavor in Allen’s mouth screamed of Dan. It was hard to ignore the taste of 14 hours worth of cigarette breaks. Their lips brushed together the second time, not quite a kiss. Then their lips actually did fit together. This kiss was tender, but neither party was quite committed.

The second flavor - _coffee?_ Dane wanted to try again to make sure. He felt Dan’s cold nose against his. 

“Alright guys, stop, but Reed, keep rolling. You gotta pull back, Dane. Reed’s going to get the close up of you this take. And guys, don’t be shy, at least not when it gets going. This is… well, you know what it means for them both. Again.”

He nodded and looked back at Dan. But Dan wasn’t there – instead there was Allen, so taken with Dane’s Lucien that he just kept staring at him with half-lidded eyes, content. Dane sucked in a breath, blinked, and became Lucien.

“Again,” John repeated. Reed nodded. Allen pulls back and rests on his elbows. Lucien does the same.

* * *

The second take was unexpected. 

 

 

“This is just the beginning, you know,” Lucien said in a low voice, watching Allen smile and look over at him.

“Your fault, Ginsy.” He moved an inch closer and rested his head on his friend’s shoulder. He didn’t speak for a few seconds, watching Allen’s chest move up and down with each breath.

“It’s all your fault.”

The sun would be coming up in maybe half an hour. Somehow, it was darker than ever. Dane could have fallen asleep right there. He shut his eyes, but knew Dan’s Allen was watching him, looking around to see if Jack had recovered. Dane wished he could see.

Then it was quiet save for the rushing water downwind. Finally-

Allen’s cold hand brushed his chin and Dane, so exhausted from the night of shooting, didn’t have to act to make Lucien appear both drowsy and surprised. He looked at the hand first, then up into the pair of warm, chocolate irises. Black curls on his forehead, nearly his eyebrow. 

He was beautiful, and the camera seemed to fade away into the morning behind him.   

“First thought best thought.” 

Smoke. Coffee. One after the other. He could feel it this time, the certainty in Allen’s lips, dominating two successive kisses in a way that signaled _this_ moment was the only thing that needed to happen for the world to be right. _But it isn’t supposed to be this way._

At this thought, Lucien pulled back. He was unsure, but he couldn’t breathe. Or... Dane couldn't breathe. The entire time they had been on set built up to this. They could have been filming any other scene on their last day, but _of course_ it was their kiss.

Allen stared at him. He’s wanting. Needy. He _needs_ this. Lucien needs it too, a truth so powerful and terrifying that it struck him speechless for the time it took Allen to lean in again. 

They kissed. Allen’s tongue was gentle, exploring.

There had been other times when Dane felt what he was feeling now, this ‘personality confusion’ as he called it. It happened a lot when he was filming other projects. It was so frequent during _KYD_ , however, that Anna sometimes took notice over the phone. She’d call him out for being overly moody, for saying things he didn’t really mean.

In the midst of a string of kisses that grew deeper and deeper, Dane wasn’t sure who was who. Each subsequent kiss during that take took him by surprise. It wasn’t work, like most love scenes. It wasn’t a job. It was just the opposite.

* * *

 

The third take was clarifying. Allen’s poem rang in Dane’s ears.

  

 

“First thought best thought.”

For a third time, Allen was beautiful.  

_Be careful._

For a third time, Allen leaned in and kissed him.

_You are not in wonderland._

For a third time, coffee and cigarettes bursting on his tongue.  

_I have heard the strange madness long growing in your soul._

Lucien pulled back, appearing unsure and searching Allen’s face. It was so clear, though – Allen was so clear, _his_ new vision. The words echoed only slightly louder than the vague ringing in Lucien’s ears.

Dane's Lucien let out a noise during the second kiss. He wasn’t sure where it came from. He wasn’t even sure he heard it himself, but he knew Dan - Allen - heard. He felt it in his tongue, and in the way five cold fingers caressed his jaw.

 _But you are fortunate_. _In your ignorance, in your isolation, you who have suffered…_

A kiss.

_Give._

Open mouths. 

_Share._

The most furious kiss yet, Dan’s hand clutching Dane’s jaw - and yes, it was Dan this time, not Allen - Dane was sure. He didn't want to stop when he knew he had to. Dan, always ridiculed for his height, always the smallest one on set, engulfed him, overwhelming Dane’s every sense. It wasn’t acting. It couldn’t be.  

“ahhthinkijus… puked on the inside…” Jack Kerouac announced. Lucien pulled back immediately, looking up and away from the most he had felt in a long time.

_Lose._

John cut the scene. A few people clapped. Dane realized how fast he was breathing and grinned as he watched Dan doing the same. He was about to say something snarky when Dan shot up from the hill and walked to the closest building, presumably to smoke. 

Dane sighed and kept smiling. He was still warm. And though the film was over, he knew. He needed to taste the coffee and cigarettes again. And he would. It felt inevitable.

 _Lest we die unbloomed_. 


End file.
